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The impossibility of my actually being with either of them made it all the more exciting. Then, once while drunk, I leaned into Justin and kissed him. I immediately regretted it, knowing exactly what would happen. Like my relationship with Brie, my friendship with Justin would be destroyed.Elliott suggested once that I shouldn't flirt with him because I had a fiancé. It was as if the only way I knew how to handle having done something I regretted was to do it again. I convinced myself that our rule was "Don't ask, don't tell."At the same time, I resented Rick for not calling me out. I also lost respect for people who fooled around with me. Ultimately, carrying on multiple relationships was a complicated way of avoiding intimacy. Because he didn't satisfy my impossible neediness, I cheated.When that relationship ended, I dated lots of people.But eventually I did go cold-turkey single for around three months, and it was one of the most transforming periods of my life. I grieved the loss of my father and became acquainted with the feelings I was running from .To be right in a relationship, I needed to get right with myself. Makeup artist Jeffree Star is one of the Internet beauty community's OG provocateurs.Today I know that while non-monogamy may be human nature, cheating is not.Everyone is capable of being honest about their feelings, wants, and needs.

The fact that I'm in a committed, monogamous relationship today is almost beside the point.He's not afraid to push the envelope when it comes to expressing himself—be it speaking his mind or using makeup to challenge gender norms.Look at his You Tube channel and you'll find him smoking weed rolled in oil-blotting papers and rocking a Going to My Ex's Funeral makeup look.Under the pretense of having something to do with school, we started exchanging emails daily.Justin and Elliott were friends, and I kept my relationship with one from the other (and both, obviously, from Rick).One night during this time, a guy named Elliott walked me home after class.